A breastfeeding thread

If you are not interested in breastfeeding, read no further.

If you are, I am going to ramble for a bit about the things that helped me in an attempt to help others.  I apologize if this is a bit soapbox-y but breastfeeding is one of the greatest joys in my life and I wish others success and happiness with it if they so desire.  I think our communities have a long way to go in terms of support and positivity.

Many, many of my friends tried breastfeeding and I only had 1 make it beyond the 6 week mark.  Almost all of them were very sad about it.  My friend that did make it wound up exclusively pumping for 14 months.  Her only advice was: get help early and often.  Proved very useful!  So when I was looking to find more information or get started, I turned to the internet.  There was never really a one-stop shop so for my friends that are out there and still reading, I hope this can be that for you.

The first thing I’d recommend is to ignore the naysayers.  I grew up formula fed as did my husband and we were a generation when it was new and sophisticated and the trendy thing to do.  As a result, our families do not always know how to be supportive.  Sometimes in life you just have to be stubborn for the things you want, and if you want to make breastfeeding work, most of the time you can.  It may be hard and you may want to vent every now and again, but be cautious not to listen to people who are negative about it.  Mom is allowed to bitch and be negative occasionally about breastfeeding if she wants, but everyone else is under radio silence.  (And if it does come that you need to supplement or formula feed, it should come from the horse’s mouth, not someone else.)  Surround yourself with a good support system.  The #1 factor in if a woman will succeed is based on the attitude of her husband and mother (I found that in a book but I am drawing a blank where – will cite if I remember).  Having been through the first weeks, it is so true.  The CDC puts out a breastfeeding report card and the statistics are interesting.  In Ohio, where I live, 64.8% of mothers try breastfeeding, 37.5% of them are still breastfeeding at least partially at 6 months, and 20.3% make it to a year.  Support is key!

Speaking of support, consider where you will have your baby.  A lot of hospitals are “baby friendly” which often translates to “breastfeeding friendly.”  Unfortunately these days many women do not have a choice in this matter as so many decisions are insurance-based.  If you do have a choice of hospital, call each and go with the one with more lactation consultants on staff.  My hospital had two part time and thankfully I delivered on a Wednesday night when one was there.  She basically held and fed my baby for me that first night because I was so exhausted.  She made Joe help, too.  And the next day, her partner came and spent 2 hours with me.  Despite me taking a class and reading all I could and being stubborn as hell to succeed, had I given birth in the middle of the night on a Saturday with no lactation consultants around, I know for a fact our outcome would have been very very different.  I took a class at the hospital where I delivered and they both remembered me.  Make breastfeeding mom friends and educate yourself.  Knowledge is power.

Additionally, writing a birth plan will go far to lay out what you would like to see happen to encourage breastfeeding to be successful.  In there I would include: contact with baby as soon as humanly possible after birth (even in the event of a c-section), delaying all unnecessary procedures until after 2 hours of skin to skin contact and the first feeding (getting vital signs is really all they need to do immediately and they can do this while the baby is on you), rooming in, and no pacifiers.  This way, you don’t have to tell the staff you intend to breastfeed; they already know.  And births don’t always go as you plan them to (mine certainly didn’t) but in my opinion, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plan at all.  Thankfully my hospital was awesome, despite not being officially designated baby friendly, and a lactation consultant was perched outside our room along with the moms waiting for me to deliver.  How’s that for service?

So now let’s talk supplies.  Just like support, you need good ones.  I’m linking all of the stuff I had and would endorse if someone asked.  There are many similar products out there though, so shop around!  Even if you will be a stay-at-home mom the investment for a double electric pump is worth it in my opinion.  I also got a hands-free bra to use which allows you to play on the internet while you’re pumping.  Take your pump with you to the hospital, and learn how to use it before the baby is born.  Do not repeat my mistake waiting to read the instructions until 2:30am with a screaming baby.  Ask in the hospital if you need bigger or smaller shields than the pump came with as this will affect your output.  Or possibly a nipple shield.  Get some soothies gel pads for the fridge and nursing pads and storage bags.

My advice in the early weeks is to BE YE LAZY.  Make it your business to feed the baby, shower occasionally, and sleep as much as possible.  When someone comes over, make them clean or cook something.  Dad should change diapers and bring you a glass of water every time you nurse.  If someone in that support system wants to know what is helpful – this is it.  They can make sure mama eats, mama makes sure baby eats.  When your supply regulates in those early weeks, you will likely have more than you need.  My advice for this point is to BE YE NOT LAZY.  As much as it sucks, and I hate pumping as much as the next person, take advantage.  Take full advantage, friends.  Pump and freeze as much as you can.  My blood pressure would be far lower right now if I had taken advantage early on and built up a better freezer stash.  There will come a day when you will need it.  And even if you decide to formula feed later, your baby can use up what you have saved before making the switch.

I have heard many women say that formula feeding is easier.  At first glance, it may appear to be.  But breastfeeding moms don’t have to make or heat bottles in the middle of the night (I am lazy – see above), and I only have to wash 4 per day.  Breastfeeding is greener and less wasteful.  Better for my baby and the environment?  Yes, please.

Put the lactation consultant on speed dial.  My insurance does not cover appointments with them, sadly.  I chose a pediatrician’s office that has one on staff, so every time I took the baby for a weight check I had an appointment with her afterward.  I think it’s worth it and I am fortunate enough to be able to spend a few dollars up front to avoid a year’s worth of formula costs.  Many women are not that lucky.  I got a “breastfeeding mom gift pack” in the hospital that was a mini shoulder bag made by Similac.  It was full of formula.  My only guess is that the “formula feeding mom gift pack” contained more?  Doctors are not allowed to endorse one brand over the other but they still find their way in – think of all the freebies they give out.  My OB’s office had free stethoscope type headphones laying out so that you could hear your baby’s heartbeat anytime.  The sponsor?  Similac.  There is no money to be made on breastmilk, and these companies know that formula is a product with a very high brand loyalty so they try to influence you early.  On Similac’s website – “Your breast milk contains the perfect blend of nutrients to give your baby a healthy start.”  They know.  They even have lactation help by phone and a breastfeeding section.  So if you make it 8 weeks and decide to quit, you’ll remember them.  Formula companies are not evil, but they are smart.  I encourage everyone to be an equally smart consumer when deciding whether to exclusively breastfeed, breastfeed and supplement, or formula feed.

I think that about sums up my thoughts.  This is a great article and debunks a lot of myths.  Kellymom.com is great as well.

What do you think?  Did you try to breastfeed?  Did it work?  If not, do you plan to try something different next time?  I’m always up for a discussion on breastfeeding if you want help or advice and if you want to send me hate mail, that’s fine too.

Edited to add: I can’t believe I forgot my favorite breastfeeding product of all!  I originally intended to borrow it from exclusive pumper friend but quickly realized I was going to wear it out so I plan to just buy a new one for her when she has her next baby.  My BrestFriend.  Amazing.  We call it the “ring of power” in our house.  Joe wears it sometimes and asks me to get him drinks.  I can’t tell you why we call it that because I promised my husband I wouldn’t write it on the internet.  It’s the only pillow that doesn’t slide around and my kid is trained like Pavlov’s Dog to get excited when he hears the buckle click.  Next time I’ll buy one for upstairs and one for down and get a few extra covers.  Right now I just lay a cloth diaper over whichever side I’m using.  You need one!

Advertisement